As a teenager, I gained an interest in religion.1 One particular Sunday, I joined a friend’s family to attend a Catholic church. As we walked through the outer doors, into the foyer, and towards the chapel doors, I noticed an odd decoration—a large shell filled with water sitting on a pedestal.
I assumed it was a fountain of some sort. When my friend reached to dip his finger in the water, I swatted his hand away (he was prone to mess with things he shouldn’t have).
Only once he touched the same finger to his forehead did I begin to realize what was happening. The shell was a receptacle of holy water and he was making the sign of the cross while entering the chapel.
I felt so foolish! 🤦🏼♂️
But nearly 30 years later, I feel vindicated! I’m not the only fool to mistake holy water for decor.
In his Letters from Hawaii, Mark Twain mentions a similar scenario:
Near the door of the church, but inside, of course, stands a small pillar, surmounted by a large shell. It may be for holy water or it may be a contribution box. If the latter be the case, I must protest that this ghastly pun—this mute suggestion to shell out—is ill suited to the sacred character of the place, and it is only with the profoundest pain that I force myself to even think for a moment upon so distressing a circumstance.
— Mark Twain, Letter’s from Hawaii, page 174
I only wish I had had the wherewithal to come up with that ghastly pun!
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I eventually joined the LDS Church (a.k.a. Mormonism) and served a mission. But before that, I visited various churches with friends from school. ↩︎